The Race that Wasn’t

Posted on May 20, 2013 by Sheila

I’ve heard it said that the actual race is just the victory lap. The real work and the real reward is in the training. And yet, I feel like I lost out on more than just a victory lap when the Iron Girl was cancelled this past Sunday.

I know that it needed to be cancelled– there was no way for it to have gone on. On Saturday night, I laid awake in bed from 2:30 on, listening to the thunder and tornado sirens. I couldn’t hear rain or see lightening, but the thunder and sirens were enough. I was so scared that the weather would be bad, but not bad enough to cancel, and I couldn’t imagine riding in the rain for 19 miles. Could I get through it safely?

Getting the notice that the race had been cancelled was, in that instant, both a disappointment and a relief. As time passed, the relief faded, the disappointment grew and the doubt started to creep in. Could I have really finished the race? Could I have handled the hills on the bike? Would I have fallen over in that last hill before transition? Would I have been able to earn the medal? Was I really an Iron Girl?

My first thought when the race was cancelled was that I could just sign up for the My First Tri Stagg is doing in a couple weeks. But now, I’m not so sure I want to do that. I still have a little time before I have to decide, but I am leaning toward not doing it.

ironI was mentally prepared to move on at this point– looking forward to a summer where I could run and swim and try some of the classes at the Y that have nothing to do with triathlon. I was ready to focus less on the bike and build the running and swimming, which I enjoy more. And part of me has. Part of me is living in a post-IronGirl world, while another part is still waiting for the race that will never be. Where I expected to feel tired and sore and proud and accomplished, I have pretty much… nothing.

So I am in a funk. I have a T-shirt and a medal that I don’t feel like I should have. I have a race number on my helmet that hasn’t seen a mile, and a crumpled bike number and race number that are crumpled because they were shoved in a bag instead of worn hard and put up wet. I don’t know if I should move on or force myself to do a tri so I attempt for some sort of sense of completion.

Hopefully, things will be a little more clear in a few days. Because, clearly, today is not a day when I able to sort it all out.

Share on Facebook

Short URL: http://tinyit.cc/278d1e  Tweet:
Posted in blah | Tagged , | Leave a comment

t-13 days

Posted on May 6, 2013 by Sheila

Oh boy. In 2 weeks, my triathlon will be over. Done. Completed (hopefully). I will admit there is still a part of me that is praying for thunderstorms and tornados so the whole thing will have to be cancelled. But mostly, I think I am ready. Not to ace it, but to finish it.

There will be lots of (fake) bike riding this week. And hopefully some running, too. Swimming is my reward for getting the other stuff done and still having time left over. Next week is becoming completely booked with other activities and events that will largely prevent me from training– but that’s supposed to be the “taper” week, right?

I’m nervous, but really, I think once this week really gets started, I’m not going to have enough time to worry about this tri anymore. Between field trips, swim team, the end of school & 5th grade graduation, my parents coming in, doctor’s appointments, tennis, make up lax tourneys, Mother’s Day, Brownies, the chicks hatching, tiger publishing and the Revenge season finale, I think my mind will be pretty full.

At least, I hope so.

Share on Facebook

Short URL: http://tinyit.cc/e84018  Tweet:
Posted in blah | Tagged | Leave a comment

Its not me, its mornings

Posted on May 2, 2013 by Sheila

Snoozing in the morning for 10 (or 9) minutes can apparently ruin the sleep you’ve gotten overnight and make you more tired during the day. (proof) It messes with your hormone levels, your sleep cycles, your circadian rhythms–even your neurotransmitters.

Also? It makes at least one of my daughters into a SUPER cranky bear EVERY morning.

BUT, if you take those same 10ish minutes of sleep in the afternoon, everything changes. It boosts your memory, helps you focus, lifts your mood and makes you less tired. It can even help you lose weight. (proof, and more proof) There is nothing this little power nap can’t do.

So, my take on this is that it isn’t me who *isn’t a morning person*. Its mornings that actually suck.

Share on Facebook

Short URL: http://tinyit.cc/1ee04e  Tweet:
Posted in blah | Tagged , | Leave a comment

iFree Zone

Posted on April 26, 2013 by Sheila

I’ve made a decision my girls are not happy about.

They are no longer allowed to have their iTouches in their bedrooms. For months, they have enjoyed going to bed listening to their choice of music or podcast without commercials. Bedtime was more peaceful.

There were some small issues. In the podcast app, there is a “sleep timer,” which I would set. In iTunes, there wasn’t one. It frustrated me a little, but it was manageable. Slightly more frustrating was the fact that the podcast sleep timer was routinely ignored and reset.

I had some misgivings about letting them text and FaceTime and instagram in the privacy of their rooms. They are good girls, and I trust them. But that is a whole lot of unfettered access to a whopping amount of technology. And they are young, and they are still learning how to deal with the technology, just like they are still figuring out how to be 9 and 11.

Is it ok to FaceTime with boys? In their rooms? Does it change when the boy is one of a set of triplets and the girls are also good friends who are always involved in the FaceTime, too? If not, how does that get controlled without ruining the friendship? Is it ok to follow friends of friends on Instagram that they don’t really know if they know most of the other friends?

Questions like this are going to continue, and I know the answers are never going to be easy. Nor are am I going to end up coming up with the same answers as my friends and my daughters’ friends’ parents. Oh, it will be interesting, and I’m sure I will be crowned the Meanest Mom EVER more than once (and more).

What made me turn the corner and make the rule was one night when I was out. The girls were exhausted and had instructions to go to bed early. Stagg got them into bed early, and that was it. What he didn’t know was that they spent the next hour and a half idly chatting with a friend. It wasn’t constant, but it was enough. And it ended with, “gotta go, my mom’s home.”

The point I am trying to make with them is that I want their bedrooms to be a place where they can sleep without distractions. And the texting is a distraction. When one daughter complained that all she was doing was telling the other 2 to stop texting because they all needed to go to sleep, she made my point for me. When the same girl complained because she wanted to listen to her podcasts at night and then said she turned the sleep timer off because the show would turn itself off when she was almost asleep, but not at the end of the show, so she had to turn it back on, she made my point again. These devices are interfering with their sleep. Sometimes its subtle, sometimes, it isn’t.

And I know we are only barely on the on-ramp of our own Information Superhighway.

They are not pleased with this rule, but they get it. Mostly. One girl has a tendency to “forget” pretty often (and it isn’t the one I would have guessed would forget). She wanders upstairs because it is where she is comfortable, where she wants to entertain and hang out with her friends, and sometimes, where she wants to read the book she’s got in iBooks.

They have been adept at finding new places to find privacy for their time with their devices. It makes me cringe a little, but I am trying to let that battle go for now. Privacy/Secrecy was not the core of this skirmish. This was about being able to unplug. My best hope is that by the time the constant connectivity would really be an issue, they will be used to it enough that they count on the iFree haven their rooms have become where they can exist without distractions.

In some way, I feel like I’ve just told them that no, they may not have their own separate phone line with phones in their own rooms. (but oh, how much easier that statement is to enforce!)

Share on Facebook

Short URL: http://tinyit.cc/9c9490  Tweet:
Posted in blah | Tagged , , | Leave a comment